Claim asylum because I feel I was born in the wrong country?

[Loser Spruce.]

Would any other developed country accept me if I tried claiming asylum there because I increasingly feel like I was born in the wrong country due to the sheer amount of times the UK is now getting compared unfavorably with any other country by both the media and the whinging grannies and grandads on Facebook?

If so, which country would most likely accept my claim for the above stated reasons?